Turkey, Christmas sales, family....that's what most people think of this time of year. But not everyone does.

Is there someone in your life that maybe you've lost track of? Or someone that you care about, but don't really want to bother with? Maybe it's a friend that you enjoy when he/she is up. However, that same life of the party can be a total party pooper when the mood swings the opposite direction. And you are busy or tired or whatever and just don't feel like dealing with that person.

So you just push that person to the back of your mind for now, deal with it later when you are more "up" yourself, right?

But what if that person was having an exceptionally hard time? Your words could make the difference between life and death. Would that make you reach out?

I've been on both sides of this coin. At the moment, I'm wishing that my friends would realize I've dropped off their radar. Part of me - you know the logical side - reminds me gently that people are people and as human nature is, we fail one another. But the soft center that gets too easily bruised, screams "Why am I so unworthy?"

I've been known to fall off before, but my core group was responsive, reminding me I was cared for. So I am not sure why things seem different, are hitting me harder this time. I probably just wore everyone out.

If I get past this episode, I hope I remember it the next time someone is bending my ear about their problems. Hopefully I will be in tune to see if someone has gone into hiding just hoping someone will look for them.

That would be something to be thankful for.

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blf

January 2011

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